When:

• August the 12th, 2023

• Wedding Ceremony: 12:00 PM CT

• Reception: 5:00 PM CT

Where:

• Wedding Ceremony:
  St. Mary’s Oratory
  325 Grand Avenue,
  Wausau, Wisconsin 54403
  USA

Travel Logistics

Airports:

• The nearest airports are, CWA (Central Wisconsin Airport), MSP (Minneapolis Saint-Paul), and MSN (Madison)

• CWA is about 20 min drive to Wausau but often has a limited selection of car rentals because of how small it is. This is the closest airport if you’re looking for pick up as it’s about 1.5 hour's drive from Medford

• MSP is a good place to fly into as it has ample, low-cost flights, plenty of car rental options, and is ~2.5 hours drive from Medford (3 to Wausau)

• MSN is also pretty small but has more options for car rentals and is only about 2 hours drive to Wausau and around 3 to Medford - depending on where you are flying from, this could be a good option we often fly to MSN because it’s an easy flight to NYC and often around the same price of MSP without the size to deal with

Lodging:

• We recommend that people stay in Medford, WI. This is the nearest town to the wedding venue (15 min drive) and is only about 50 min drive to the Ceremony Venue (Wausau)
  If you are flying out of CWA or MSN, and are okay with a 1-hour drive after the reception to the hotel, you could also find a location in Wausau. This would put you closer to your airport destination depending on your travel plans.

• Please Note: Reservations need to be made at least 1 month in advance to take advantage of the room blocking.

• The two locations we have spoken with are:

  • Boarders Inn & Suites by Cobblestone Hotels (Medford)
    435 S 8th St,
    Medford, WI 54451 - USA
    (715) 748-2330

  • Woodlands Inn & Suites (Medford)
    854 N 8th St,
    Medford, WI 54451 - USA
    (715) 748-3995

If you’re seeking assistance with logistics, please reach out

Silas: silasmahner@gmail.com / (715) 301-8310
Mom: (715) 748-9043

Gifting

For the most part, we already have the necessities of life. We plan to live in NYC for 2 or 3 more years and space is limited. So, we are asking for financial gifts toward the following causes instead of physical gifts.

• Our Future Home Fund
  One day we will likely move out of NYC and buy a home. Where that is yet, is TBD but at some point, we are seeking space (and lower taxes). Contributions to this fund will be greatly appreciated.

• Honeymoon Fund
  We are planning to take a week or two to spend in Spain for our honeymoon. Contributions to this are also greatly appreciated.

• Wedding Expense Fund
  Given that we have both the Traditional Introduction Ceremony in Uganda and the Christian Wedding in Wisconsin, there are significant expenses. Mostly for travel expenses of our families from the US to Uganda. Contributions are greatly appreciated.

We also thank all of those who have helped with their time and talents to help make these special days happen.

We also ask that with each of these gifts, you include a note with any special wishes or pieces of marriage advice. These notes are very special to us and we look forward to reading and re-reading them throughout our lifetime.

We also welcome gifts of special items to commemorate our special day.

How to gift?

You can send checks to:

• Silas Mahner
  W5681 Fox Ave, Medford, WI 54451

Or, you can Venmo or PayPal using the codes below

From Lynn’s Perspective

The leading-up moment

In the summer of 2020, I met up with friends for a picnic and one of them encouraged us to try dating apps, as she had found herself a partner. I am quite a skeptical person, so you can imagine how crazy I thought this idea was. Later that summer, my adventurous spirit pushed me to step out of my comfort zone and give it a try. 

Out of my Comfort Zone

Of all the conversations I had with the few men I interacted with, the first message from Silas was quite interesting… “ Are you Catholic? ” I was amazed at how he knew without an explicit statement in my profile. We had great initial conversations and had our first video call that lasted three hours. Due to his consistency, I decided to focus on him as he seemed most interested in building a relationship. In contrast, it was an extremely busy time for me; I was completing my EMT course and I was  preparing to retake the MCAT. Thus, it felt like our timing was off. I intended to start my career early and so, I was not as active as I would have wanted to be with him. However, when he reached out to know where our relationship stood, he manifested qualities of commitment, responsibility, and vulnerability which stood out to me. Additionally, belonging to the same faith, having mature conversations, and our life goals established a solid start of our journey.

By October 2020 , we were communicating via Instagram and had stopped using the Hinge app. I endeavored to check in as much as I could. Silas requested for my phone number and I was initially hesitant, but with further conversation, it felt natural to share it.

It is funny how we have been cultured to think the chase is one-sided, that the men do all the chase. In reality, the other person also chases eventually. As it takes two to tango, it takes two people to make a relationship work. I found myself initiating conversations, many of which were debates about politics at the time, gender roles, our conditioned beliefs, pet peeves, among other things.

Meeting in Person and the Dates

You must be wondering when we started meeting in person — Our first in-person date was in March of 2021. This was about 6 months after our first chat on the Hinge app (definitely a long time). This happened because I was still skeptical to meet right after our first conversation and Silas had to go back home (Wisconsin) to spend the holidays with family from October 2020 to a little after New Year’s (2021). There were many possibilities that he could have moved on, but I think my consistent check-ins and making him special Thanksgiving and Christmas cards showed him that I cared and was interested in furthering our relationship. The first date was at a restaurant near Bryant Park.  Our conversation was so smooth and full of laughter that it seemed like we had known each other for years. Even though it was too early to determine anything, the first date was a good start that led to the second date, and many after.

The second date was at the Botanical Gardens in the Bronx because I wanted him to experience The Bronx and its culture. We took a bus to Gardens and I observed that Silas adapted quite well to the “ Bronx way of life.” He did not complain or seem uncomfortable which made me like him more. I made an Ugandan dish, chapati (looks like pitta bread) and he made lamb and baked sweet potatoes which were delicious. We enjoyed the beauty of the gardens and learned about each other’s cultures. On the third date, at Brooklyn bridge park, we enjoyed some amazing food Silas made (He’s a good cook). He ensured to accommodate my food allergies, which was thoughtful and sweet of him. We also shared deep conversation about our families.

The fourth date was a special one because he officially asked me to be his girlfriend. I also met his friends at his church, some of whom I have grown close to. The fifth date was on 4th of July. After celebrating Jackie’s  birthday (one of my sisters), I continued to my date with Silas. We shared a delicious meal at Jean Claude restaurant and walked to enjoy the beautiful sunny day. Later after watching the fireworks, Silas shared that he had to move to Florida for a few months. This news was harder for me than anticipated becauseI was scared things could change drastically with distance, on top of how busy we both were. However, by God’s grace, it all worked out as Silas returned to New York after two months.

Uncertainties that define our path

Unfortunately, during the Spring of 2022,  I did not hear back from medical schools; I considered trying for medical school, but the various circumstances in my life seemed better fitting with either Physician Assistant (PA) or the Nurse Practitioner (NP) routes. This took a couple of months of overthinking, fear, and doubts but, seeking God’s will, my exposure to the clinical field, and utilizing my network helped me narrow down to the NP route. Making such a big decision while navigating a relationship in its early stages was very challenging. I was in a dilemma of the conflict between my career goals and my relationship with marriage in mind. There were so many changes happening at the same time and many unknowns. Additionally, if Silas’ work required him to move again, I was unsure how we would make our relationship if we were being pulled in different directions.

After much deliberation around June of 2022, I was set to pursue nursing and only intended to have a relationship with someone who was ready to settle and build a life together through thick or thin.

We had friction because of contradicting beliefs and very different upbringings, but after talking through all of them and seeking guidance from parents, mentors, and close friends; we came to common ground. However, as any evolving relationship, it will be work in progress.

DIRECTION TOWARD PROPOSAL

In October of 2021, Silas invited me to meet his family in Wisconsin. I was anxious because it is a big step and uncertain of how my interaction with his family would go. He assured me that they were welcoming people, but that did not take away my anxiety. I am so grateful to God that it was all smooth. We have visited several times since then. Silas also met my whole family eventually and he occasionally spends weekends with us.

Seemingly on the same wavelength, I started to feel that Silas was my God-sent partner for life. After some deep conversations, he also mentioned that he felt the same towards me. One weekend during the last fall, Silas asked my parents for my hand in marriage and all went well.

Last December, my family spent Christmas in Wisconsin with Silas’ family. I prayed for them to get along and the Lord granted my prayer. On the other hand, since Silas had asked my parents for my hand in marriage, I was anticipating that Silas would propose. However, II did not know what day it would be. Silas proposed to me the day after Christmas in the presence of both our families; this is one of the most memorable days in my life and the most surreal experience I have ever had.

Growth from the process

The initial virtual interactions allowed me time to build an emotional bond and trust with my fiancé before meeting in person to then eventually open up. He was definitely more eager to meet right away and it was a real challenge for him. Thus, I am so grateful for his patience with me and for respecting my preferences. It took reliance on God to know myself and have the strength to go into the unknown, my support system, and the willingness to compromise.

Currently, as we are preparing for marriage, I am both excited and anxious because of all the changes that will come along. However, I believe Silas is God-sent and I can not imagine getting through life with anyone else.

From Silas’ Perspective

LEading up to Meeting

At the end of 2019, I decided I wanted to move out of Wisconsin. I knew that I wanted to move to a city in the US, originally had tried to move to Detroit but after a concerted effort to get a job there, I concluded it wasn’t God’s Will for me to go there.

3 days later, I bumped into someone through the Praxis network who asked me if I wanted to work in recruitment in NYC. Fast forward to March 2nd, 2020 I was hauling my 3 suitcases up 4 flights of stairs at my temporary Airbnb in Brooklyn.

As we all know Covid shut the world down a few weeks later. It was a surreal experience. Of course, this made it very difficult to meet people. Eventually, I decided to set up a Hinge Account to see if I could find true love. You might laugh or poke fun, but it was pretty tough being totally alone in NYC without a network of friends.

How We Met

In September of 2020, I connect with Lynn. Except, I didn’t know her name was Lynn. She had her profile name set as Sky.

Because I find it kind of funny I’ll tell it. My initial message to her was, after seeing some context clues that she might be Catholic, I sent her “Are you Catholic"?”. Real smooth I know, but hey, here we are so…take note fellas?

To be honest, it’s because of God that we are here because after meeting her, we had a few video calls and then I went back to Wisconsin for a few months during the end of the year to be close to family. I was pretty sure it wouldn’t work out. I didn’t see how long distance would be feasible to get to know each other.

But, Lynn messaged me a few times on Whatsapp around Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter to say hi and wish me well. This was the first time in my year of trying to find the love of my life that I didn’t have to be the one to put in all the effort. I was quite surprised but didn’t really get the hints that she was actually interested in me. In my eyes, if she was interested she would have taken me up on meeting in person for a coffee before I left in October.

Feeling pretty defeated, I was talking with Fuzzy at the end of 2020 and she gave some of the best advice ever. “Silas, don’t worry about girls. Just live your life and God will put the one in your lap eventually.” No, I didn’t believe this, but I did take her advice.

Going into 2021 I said, I’m not going to be on any dating apps. Just going to live my life and see how it goes.

When I came back to the City at the end of January (2021) I figured, hey, I should at least meet this Sky girl to see how it goes. Maybe I’ll at least make a friend.

We had a meetup scheduled but it got canceled when the day before I happened to hang out with a friend whose entire family had gotten Covid - Sky was quite careful of this so we pushed out the meeting.

Finally, nearly 6 months after our initial meeting, we met in Bryant Park on March 6th, 2021. I remember seeing her from across the park and knowing it was her despite having a mask on. Brownish braids, a long grey coat, and winter boots. That day we shared an omelet at L’Addresse, a French Restaurant just across from the park. I remember falling pretty hard when I first saw her smile after she took off her mask. Don’t mean to be dramatic, but I do think I fell in love with her right there.

After lunch, we walked all the way from there to the 110th 6 station entrance. For those not familiar with NYC, that’s 4.6 miles. And it was a not-so-pleasant winter day. I don’t remember what we talked about to be honest. But we just kept talking and talking. I feel like I did a lot of the talking but at the end, I was really excited to see her again.

At the time she was preparing to take the MCAT. So, I actually didn’t see her again until the end of March I believe. I have a hard time remembering the exact times here because I’m not sure if we were able to see each other before I went back to Wisconsin for Easter. I know that our dates averaged about 1 every month for the next 3 months. To me, this was difficult. I had a tendency with dating prior to this to go out more often and get to know the person faster. This was ultimately a good learning experience for me.

The reason I was patient enough to do this was that I felt as if I had found the right person, and I didn’t want to mess it up.

On June 27th of 2021, I officially asked her to be my Girlfriend. It took that long for me to think that if I asked her she would say yes. She’s a very slow-moving person when it comes to this stuff.

Some Challenges

It was really tough for us right then because my company would go on to make me relocate to Florida. We knew it was coming but in early July I moved. Thankfully that only lasted 2 months because those were some of the toughest months for us with the distance.

In her culture, meeting her parents is usually something that doesn’t happen until the man is essentially “asking permission” to marry her. So, contrary to my preference I didn’t end up meeting her parents until the end of December 2021 when I stayed with them for a few days before spending the month of January (2022) in Portugal.

This was a big moment for us all and thankfully, it went well.

In the spring of 2022, Lynn was at a point to make a decision between taking a shorter education route toward PA or Nursing or going for a moonshot chance at Med School. I had made it pretty clear that I didn’t see how feasible the latter route was so we had a point where, despite us not being engaged, we had to have some very difficult conversations about really committing to each other. She was going to be essentially changing her vision for her life and career so that we could make this work.

Ultimately, we decided that we were confident calling each other “My Person”.

For me, it was the first time the reality of what Marriage really is hit me. I learned a lot through that situation and it forced me to have a bit of a step up in maturity.

Proposal

From there, I was essentially ready to propose, but in her culture, our parents both need to meet before that can happen. Originally we had planned a trip to Wisconsin in August of 2022, but it ended up not working out so we pushed it back to Christmas.

During that weekend, I didn’t waste any time and popped the question after only 1.5 days of the families spending time together.

Where we are now

I can’t imagine committing my life to anyone else. At this point, Lynn is the person who is always there for me when I am in need of someone to talk to. We are getting to a point where we really know each other to the point of knowing how the other will react to even minor situations. I’m just so grateful that God brought me to NYC. That in itself is an entire story. A bit of a spoiler, God had been planning to bring me here since my childhood when I would meet two fellas who were Abbés with the Institute and stationed in Wausau, WI.